Remember the Good

Part of being healthy is having healthy thoughts. There are some days when I can’t stop thinking about mistakes I have made in the past. There was that time when I hurt so-and-so, or the time I ruined a special moment because I acted before thinking, or I made a fool of myself…. The list really could go on and on. Those memories have a way of sticking around. Sometimes they are more potent than all my successes added together!

Negative memories can help us to learn from mistakes, so I’ve never been one to say, “I live my life with no regrets.” There is, however, a danger is letting negative moments in our past overshadow our good moments, and ultimately leave us feeling rather bleak. We can begin to think dangerous thoughts, like “I always make mistakes” or “I can’t get anything right.” Once we start heading down that road, very quickly we can start believing we are a failure, and then easily become just that.

Let’s try a mental exercise to deal with our not-so-nice memories. When something from the past comes to mind, think about something good that has come from it. If it is a positive memory, it’s easy. But what about the negative memories? Can we think of good that came out of those?

I’ll try the exercise myself. I once house-sat for a family and accidentally spilled candle wax on their carpet. To this day I feel bad about it. So how can good come from it? Well, through that incident I learned that the people who owned the house are kind and forgiving people. I learned that there are good people who understand when we make mistakes and who forgive us.

Go ahead and try it. When you’re done with the exercise, don’t let yourself think of the negative memory for the rest of the day. Chances are it will not return to haunt you tomorrow or ever again.