Day One: Crash, Burn, & Logic

After weeks of mental prepping, and emotional pepping, Day One started off with a bang.  Of the crash and burn variety.

I woke up this morning to my daughter declaring that I have students at the front door waiting.  I glanced at the clock and realized...it's almost 10 o'clock!  What???  I haven't slept to 10 in... months? years? decades?

In my foggy state, I grabbed my phone to see I had 2 missed calls and several missed texts.  I clicked open my calendar app and surely enough, I had scheduled 4 piano lessons starting at 10 am on Saturday morning.

Moving as quickly as possible, I lumbered out of bed, grabbed on clothes, and ran a brush though my hair.  I made it down to welcome my students only 8 minutes late.

This past week I've been suffering from another ear infection, one of the side effects of the many allergies I spoke about yesterday.  My ear this morning was completely clogged, making my movements sluggish. Whenever someone spoke, it took me about twice as long as normal to process.

As I sat and listened to the first student go through her piano scales, it hit me that I hadn't eaten.  I hadn't had water!  I hadn't had coffee!!  And today was Day One!!!

The shakiness started during the 3rd lesson.  By the time I finished, it was past noon, and I was ready for food and a shower and possibly my bed again.  This day was really not going as I anticipated. Without giving much thought other than needing to feel better, I opened the refrigerator, pulled out last night's dinner leftovers, and warmed it up in my Starbucks Oregon mug.  And I ate it. Olive oil-saturated pasta salad.  Crash and burn.

After my shower, lying on my bed, feeling tired, shaky, and intense ear pain, the solution came: Make Day One start tomorrow.  After all, I royally messed up and I can't salvage today.  Make sense, right?

Actually, it makes emotional sense, but not logical sense.  

A couple of days ago I thought through the most important mental aspects of a life change.  I came up with these four: Logic, Organization, Faith, and Social Support.

Logic tells me to keep trying even though I fail.  Logic tells me that everything I eat the day before starting a diet is just as significant as everything I eat the first day of the diet.  Logic says what I eat today and tomorrow will effect the way my body feels 5 years from now.

Emotions say, you messed up, may as well splurge today.  Logic says, pick up where you left off and
keep trying.

Emotionally I wanted to give up.  Logically, I needed to do this day just as I had planned.

The crux: eating healthy isn't the exception, it's the rule.

So guess what?  I listened to Logic instead of Emotion.  I dutifully measured out my afternoon snack and dinner. Today wasn't perfect, but I don't need perfection.  Today was proof that I can keep going, and I definitely need that!